Help Request for a Future Time
Feb. 9th, 2022 10:15 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
baitalHello friends!
I have mentioned a few times in various spaces that I have PMDD (Pre- or Peri-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder - https://iapmd.org/about-pmdd) and am working on navigating how best to not just survive it, but continue to thrive where I can. The last few flares have been Very Bad, and a few people have asked how best they can help. Because I am Lucid!Larisa right now, it's possible for me to ask for help that PMDD!Larisa is emotionally, mentally, and physically incapable of asking for.
The best possible things for PMDD!Larisa seem to be Bids For Connection that DO NOT include the really fraught and terrible "How Are You Doing?" Please do not ask PMDD!Larisa how they are doing. They are not doing well and they do not want to talk about it.
So here are some helping ideas!
Timing: Set a calendar alert or an alarm for the week between February 26 and March 5. Later in that window is the best time to reach out, as it seems like the last 3 days of a flare seem to be the worst.
Some ideas for Best Bids for Connection include:
Telling me that you heard/listened to a song that made you think of me.
Bonus points for if it reminds you of a nice experience we had together.
Sharing stupid jokes, bad puns, memes that made you lol (bonus for 'and think of me',) shaggy dog tales
Small creative gifts, which include short playlists or digital art or photographs of cool things you saw that you thought I would like.
General "remember when..." memory-reminders of shit we've done together.
Things that are often fraught during that time:
The dreaded "How are you doing?"
Actual face-to-face company
Compliments
Snark (some lighthearted saltiness can be good, but if it starts getting too vent-y it can go a bad direction in my head)
And yes, I AM working with my medical team on pharmaceutical solutions, but even Lucid!Larisa is grudgingly admitting that having a social support network is important to mental health.
I have mentioned a few times in various spaces that I have PMDD (Pre- or Peri-Menstrual Dysphoric Disorder - https://iapmd.org/about-pmdd) and am working on navigating how best to not just survive it, but continue to thrive where I can. The last few flares have been Very Bad, and a few people have asked how best they can help. Because I am Lucid!Larisa right now, it's possible for me to ask for help that PMDD!Larisa is emotionally, mentally, and physically incapable of asking for.
The best possible things for PMDD!Larisa seem to be Bids For Connection that DO NOT include the really fraught and terrible "How Are You Doing?" Please do not ask PMDD!Larisa how they are doing. They are not doing well and they do not want to talk about it.
So here are some helping ideas!
Timing: Set a calendar alert or an alarm for the week between February 26 and March 5. Later in that window is the best time to reach out, as it seems like the last 3 days of a flare seem to be the worst.
Some ideas for Best Bids for Connection include:
Telling me that you heard/listened to a song that made you think of me.
Bonus points for if it reminds you of a nice experience we had together.
Sharing stupid jokes, bad puns, memes that made you lol (bonus for 'and think of me',) shaggy dog tales
Small creative gifts, which include short playlists or digital art or photographs of cool things you saw that you thought I would like.
General "remember when..." memory-reminders of shit we've done together.
Things that are often fraught during that time:
The dreaded "How are you doing?"
Actual face-to-face company
Compliments
Snark (some lighthearted saltiness can be good, but if it starts getting too vent-y it can go a bad direction in my head)
And yes, I AM working with my medical team on pharmaceutical solutions, but even Lucid!Larisa is grudgingly admitting that having a social support network is important to mental health.